Sensitive people have the tendency to listen with their hearts first, then with their ears

Every day we come into contact with a myriad of people - at home, at work, and on social networks - with whom we communicate, but often incorrectly. 

By communication, we mean an intellectual and emotional exchange, but for this to take place, it is necessary not only to speak but also and above all to listen.

If the amount of daily contact has increased exponentially - also thanks to technology - the same cannot be said for our ability to listen. 

Here is what prevents us from listening, and how to remedy this situation.

via Psychology Today

The "mental noises" that disturb listening

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Listening comes directly from the heart, from the emotional part of each of us. When we no longer want to listen, we often activate a sort of "automatic listening", so that it seems like we are paying attention to others, but in reality, what is actually occurs are the following situations, that we can define as "mental noises": 

• 1. We do not want to open ourselves to the convictions of others - which would put our own to the test;
• 2. We believe we have nothing to learn from others; 
• 3. We are focused too much on ourselves, which prevents us from actually seeing others; 
• 4. We only listen to what confirms our ideas. 

Our mind speaks to us at all times and the voices from the past are mixed with our desires, fears, beliefs, worries, and emotions. This makes it difficult for us to listen. However, it is essential to silence these noises, because the foundation of human relationships is the capacity for deep, emotional, authentic interconnection with others; and without it, we deny our human nature.

How to develop our listening skills

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How can you start listening again? 

• 1. Silence your mind and slow down, so that you can regain some control over your surroundings. You can practice disconnecting yourself for a little while every day from outside noises such as - smartphones, traffic, television, etc. 
• 2. Develop your ability to sense the emotions of others, i.e., empathy. Look at your interlocutor with a smile and in a sincere way, to make him or her, understand that you truly comprehend them.
• 3. Be receptive to other points of view, and the world that surrounds you, by opening your mind and being curious. Each one of us has lived different experiences, maturing convictions in this regard, and each is as valid as our own. Sometimes a simple conversation can reveal something new and cause us to change; we just need to have the courage to try.

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