Sometimes we stop being who we are because life forces us to be something we're not
We must make courageous choices to be ourselves and faithful to our identity, avoiding spaces and dynamics that make us feel bad. But what does it mean to be yourself? Strange as it may seem, there are many people who have not yet succeeded in forming their personality.
Knowing who we are, to know our limits, and our passions, helps us to be clear about what we want for ourselves. Beyond the work we do, "I'm a policeman", "I teach at a driving school", "I'm a factory worker", or "I'm a parent", there is something else.
In fact, we are individuals and we are not the only people who do these jobs --- we are also what we dream, what we have experienced, what we do not want, what we expect from life ... And all of this deserves to be defended.
The hunger for authenticity is present in us every day. We want to be ourselves in every decision we make and we want harmony in each of our relationships. In essence, we are anxious to safeguard that epicenter in which our identity is found.
And yet, it still happens. Almost without knowing how it happens, we stop being ourselves when, at work, we end up carrying out tasks that we do not like or identify with. We stop being ourselves when we say "yes" to our partner, the family or any other person when what we needed to say out loud was a resounding "no".
Sooner or later comes the moment when we look in the mirror and although we recognize our physical features and personal characteristics, we end up with a tremendous sense of anguish knowing that we have stopped being ourselves to become what life has asked us to be.
Psychologist Mark Leary, a professor at Duke University, warns us that when a person fully perceives his or her lack of authenticity, they experience great suffering.
The University of Harvard analyzed through a study that the keyword in many work environments is "being authentic". However, we are obliged to be part of complex work teams, to follow the dictates set by managers. All this is a double-edged sword. Little by little anxiety and stress appear when we are fully aware that, far from being authentic, we have become subordinated and alienated.
When we lack authenticity, we are forced to find a balance between what we do and what we need. Between what we are and what we achieve. Consequently, something we need to consider is that being true to oneself is not easy, it requires that we learn to make convincing and courageous decisions.
Therefore, where they do not allow us to express ourselves or prove our worth, it is better to escape.
Currently, psychology refers to many existential currents. One of these reminds us that in order to enjoy an authentic life it is necessary to commit to ourselves. We must take our own value into account, set our future goals and, above all, do not put ourselves in second place. We are not a member of the cast, we are the protagonist.
