Gay man adopts autistic boy: "it's not easy and I'm single but he gives me all the strength I need"
The birth of a baby is an event that changes the life of every parent and is a gift that does not necessarily have to be the result of one's own biology. Adoption, in fact, is one of the most generous gestures a person can make in their life: it changes the future of a child who, until that point, has not been very fortunate. Adoption of a child like this, in most cases, guarantees the infant the care, protection and healthy environment that everyone deserves. The bond that is created between child and adoptive parent is even stronger than those who share the same genes.
An example of this is Ruben, a Mexican man who had to face many challenges in his life, but realized the greatest joy of his life when he became a father.
At the age of seven, Ruben moved from Mexico to the United States with his family: his journey in life was not at all easy. In fact, he even had to ford a icy river crossing from Mexico into the US. Once he reached America, he lived with his family in Texas in great poverty. The difficulties for Ruben were not only economic: ever since he was an adolescent, he was the victim of bullying because of his homosexuality and his foreign nationality. In spite of everything, he got a degree and obtained a great job at just 29 years of age. Throughout, he constantly celebrated his successes with his family by his side.
Once these important milestones were reached, Ruben began to believe that, in order to feel truly complete and fulfilled in life, he had to become a parent. He understood that adoption would provide him with a real purpose in life, as well as the ability to make a significant difference in the life of a little one who had no family. So, at the age of 33, he began his new journey to adopt a child. He knew what obstacles he would have to face along the way, especially how to balance work with taking care of a child's needs. Despite this, he didn't want to give up on his dream.
Ruben met little Hector for the first time in 2017, a year after starting the adoption process and gaining US citizenship. At that time, he was very upset and stressed out due to the complex, lengthy application and approval procedures for adoption: he was single, worked full time and had no close relatives to assist him: his profile did not seem suitable for adopting a child.
Then the wonderful 7-year-old Mexican boy popped onto the scene and managed to steal Ruben's heart from the very beginning. Their bond was immediate: they spent their days eating out and playing together. At that time, Hector wasn't talking - because of his autism - but just pointing at things. Everyone was surprised by the ease with which the child bonded with Ruben.
"I don't know what happened, I just wanted to take care of him right away," Ruben recalled about their first meeting. Unfortunately, he was not chosen as an adoptive parent for the child. Another year passed before he received a phone call that changed his life: he was cleared to adopt the little Mexican boy who had captured his heart and who, until that point, had not been able to find a suitable adoptive family.
Despite the joy of welcoming a son, Ruben had no qualms about admitting that he feared he might not be able to take proper care of Hector. The little one did not speak and had major behavioral problems due to his autism. The man tried from the very beginning to support him, even enlisting the help of professionals. One night, he found himself sitting on the kitchen floor crying. Then a small miracle happened: Hector approached him and consoled him, uttering a phrase that will remain etched in Ruben's mind for the rest of his life: "Don't give up, you can do it". These few words gave Ruben the strength to fight for little Hector.
On August 14, 2020 Ruben and Hector were finally able to fulfill their dream, officially becoming a happy, united family.
